Having Babies Is Easy, Raising Kids Is Hard

Three weeks ago we added a new baby to our household. His name is Pilgrim.

As I write he is sitting beside me nibbling on my leg when he should be nibbling on a toy. The mother instinct in me loves having a baby in the house again. He's snuggly, tiny, has that baby pup smell. Everyone keeps saying I am crazy to add a puppy - asking, "Don't you have enough going on?" I haven't had a puppy in a long time and taking care of this little guy has made me realize that unlike my true motherhood role, this one only gets easier with time.

The challenge of puppy rearing is right up front - house training, crate training, walking on a leash. Immediately putting up the child gates to keep them out of unwanted places. Keeping destruction to a minimum. And teaching them to obey your commands all take place in the first six months. And then around their first birthday, they settle down and become a great companion for life.

Babies on the other hand are demanding little creatures with the constant nursing and diaper changes. And then the around the age of 1, the real work begins. You have to teach them to socialize. At two you have tantrums, at three and four you are teaching them rules and manners. And then they get a little older and you are faced with the demands of schools, extra curricular activities that expose them to sports and music but take a whole lot of shuffling from point A to point B, speech therapy and eye therapy. You find yourself having to make difficult decisions to ensure success later in life. Around six or seven they start disobeying and defying your authority, as if they know what's best. Oh, and what I really am not ready to handle has just started...the curiosity. About THAT stuff... I've recently engaged in some seriously humorous conversations.

Chapel: Mom, I don't want to have a baby, it would hurt too much.

Me: Oh, Chapel, once you hold that baby you won't remember any of that.

Chapel: But I think it would really hurt my penis....

Me: What? You don't have a penis. A penis is what we call Jude and Eli's wink.....

Chapel: Oh (long pause)...... well then Olivia J. has it ALL wrong!!!!!

Chapel: Mom, when Dad took us to Spencer's to buy disco lights for our dance party, I saw these tuxedo underwear for men that said Serving It Up Hot! And I know what that means.....

Me: Oh yeah? What does it mean?

Chapel: Well you know, a waiter wears a tuxedo and serves you food that is hot and then a guy can be hot.

Me: Oh my! I guess you do know what that means!

Ah, motherhood does come in many forms. In the end, I am just working toward creating good life companions and good citizens, whether they be of the human or canine variety. There are no certainties and no shortcuts, just a whole lot of hard work!

Showered With Love

Happy, Happy Mother's Day. My kids, as always, made it an extra special weekend. They have been working for days at both home and school on cards and little goodies to surprise me with. Brett surprised me with a new phone, thank goodness I now have one that will charge! He also made reservations for us to eat brunch at Blu here on Folly. It was delicious and we were all hungry by the time we arrived and so stuffed by the time we left that Chapel suggested a Mother's Day nap. 

Me and the kids at Blu.

Showing off our goofy side....

Conor and Jude decorated these little pots and planted the flower for me. They were so proud of their work!

Chapel gave me her Top Ten Reasons she loves me. This was sooooo sweet and melted my heart. My favorite one is, I love my mom because she finds the stuff I need. 

And she also made several cards and presented them to me periodically during the day.

And my tender hearted Eli kicked off the weekend with a Spa Day for Moms at school on Friday. He painted my nails, gave me a massage, and made a sachet. I had six pink nails, three purple and one blue.

He also made this most fun card!


And knowing I love my pocket Simon - taped it inside.

Being showered with all this attention and love, and seeing how excited they are to give me their gifts, makes me feel like one lucky mama.

Thirteen Reasons Blogs Are Neglected

#13. Disney Cruises

Between the packing, driving, actual vacation and returning to your daily return post-cruise, there is hardly time to breathe, much less sit down and put together the hundreds of pictures and words that accompany the trip. To summarize, the cruise, our second in two years, was the perfect combination of fun for the kids and luxury for the adults. I have said it before, but I shall say it again - Disney does everything well! This year, MaMa Anne, Aunt Crystal and cousins Bren and Cross joined us and it was nice to have them to share the magic with.

#12. Swim Lessons

Conor and Jude have finally started swim lessons. They have already completed one 6 week session and are now in their second class. Since they have started wearing goggles in the pool, they are much happier swimmers. Before goggles, the "chipmunk face" terrified them. I think that is when they have to put their heads in the water. One of Jude's friends from his pre-school class has joined this second session and Jude is so funny about which swim trunks he wears each week. I guess he doesn't want to be uncool in front of his little buddy...

#11. Easter

Easter weekend was busy and spent in Garden City, SC. Brett and I worked on getting Club Paradise (which you will read about in detail later in this post) ready for renters. I happened to see this big bunny and ran back to the beach house as fast as I could to gather the kids - I did not want them to miss the Easter Bunny. Chapel, however, in her ever pragmatic way, reasoned it was just a person in a bunny costume. Her prediction was proven correct when the lady asked them if they would like a piece of candy from her basket.

Going through their Easter baskets the next morning at MaMa Anne's beach house.

#10. Field Trips
Conor and Jude went on their first ever field trip right around Easter. It was the Charleston Ballet's production of the Velveteen Rabbit. I don't know how, but I had never read the book nor did I know the story of this rabbit. The ballet was beautiful and the story touching. And although they loved watching, I think they found the car ride over in Margot's mom's mini-van to be even more entertaining. They felt like "big kids".

#9. Birthday Celebrations that Last over 2 Weeks
Seriously, we celebrated Eli Barker's 6th birthday this year for nearly two weeks. We had a small family birthday party in Garden City, we went to Medieval Times, we went to eat at Myabi's, I took donuts to his class, he had a HUGE party at Chuck-E-Cheese. Oh, and he got a Playstation 3 the weekend before his birthday and that was like another party in our house. He was one happy little kid, though. If only every day could be a birthday!

And let me add, I spent way too much time on Goodie Bags! Check out the awesomeness that went into each bag!

#8. Field Day (twice in one day)
What are the chances that Ashley Hall and Charleston Collegiate would hold their Field Days on the same Friday? And what are the chances that Ashely Hall has a sports field on Johns Island only 1 mile from Eli's school? That morning, I was able to watch Chapel participate in her events and see her get back on the bus to school and then drive over to Eli's school in the afternoon and watch his field day festivities. Rarely do my days ever go that smoothly when there are two big events being held.

#7. Ninja Breakdancing
Charleston Collegiate also held a talent show recently. Any class or individual could voluntarily participate and Eli's class decided a ninja breakdancing routine was just what the show needed. These nine boys have been a tight group since day one, and I love watching them interact. They planned their costumes, hair and dance routine. What's even more awesome, they won the lower school division!

#6. Late Afternoons on the Beach
Now that the weather is warming up and the days are getting a bit longer, we have been using our free time in the afternoons to take strolls on the beach. This time of year and that time of day are by far my favorite times spent on the beach. It is so peaceful, the kids run around and explore and you don't have to worry about a beach bag, sunscreen, shovels, towels, etc. It's just me and the kids and the beach. Pure joy!

#5. Husband's Birthday
We Barkers celebrate not one, but two, birthdays during the month of April. My hubby is a low-key kinda birthday guy. I let each kiddo pick out a present for their dad and they got a huge kick out of watching him open their individualized gifts. We also ordered a decadent chocolate cake from Earthfare! I love that the kids are genuinely just as excited celebrating a parent's birthday as each other's.

#4. Strep Throat
Yuck, yuck, yuck. After making it through much of the winter with little sickness, we were hit hard with strep throat. Not one, but both three-year-olds in our home came down with this yucky bug. Three days of high fever (note the thermometer reads 104) two doctor's office visits and 10 days of antibiotics later, everyone was well on the mend and back to school.

#3. Sunday Night Dance Parties
When we have a dance party, we have a dance party. Decorations, new strobe lights, costumes and displaced furniture are only the beginning. The kids love a good dance party and my husband is an amazing DJ. Chapel and I handled the decorations. All in all, a great way to spend an evening with your family.

#2. Ladybug Release Night

This is a yearly event at the Barker house! We purchase a little container of these natural pest controllers and let them fly all around our prized lemon tree. The kids get soooo excited. Entertaining and good for the yard.

#1. VRBO
Oh my! We finally got Club Paradise, Papa Ed's beach house, ready for summer rentals and I managed to convince Brett that we could do a better job managing the rentals than the rental company it had been with previously. We spent a good bit of time actually working on the house and listed it a little later than we had planned. I was actually worried no one would be interested. Total underestimation on my part. After like 20 phone calls a day and 100 emails every other day, the house rented for the entire summer in less than 5 weeks. We worked on leases, deposits, arrangements, and on and on. It has been a very time consuming undertaking. Here's hoping the summer goes smoothly, and the renters are happy! Here, the kids enjoy the brand new dock this past weekend!

All The Kids in Bloom

Sometimes your weekends are great, and it's not because of any one thing, but a combination of little things that are well timed. Friday was low key -with the exception of a little dress up for school. Chapel participated in "Dress As Your Favorite Book Character" to kick off Ashley Hall's week long book festival. She was none other than the super solving sleuth, Nancy Drew:

Even the teachers got involved. Here we have a very convincing Ms. Viola Swamp!

Saturday morning we hit the ground running. Chapel's school chorus was invited to sing at Barnes & Noble to celebrate both the release of the new Fancy Nancy book and in recognition of book fair week at school! Here are the wonderfully talented and ever entertaining, Caroline's Carolers performing at B&N.

After that, we were off to a girls only birthday party for Margot at Little Gym. Conor had the best time playing with her friends from school.

On the ride to the party she announced over and over that it was girls only and that daddy, Jude and Eli were not invited. She felt so BIG to be going somewhere with no brothers or sister!

And then on Sunday it was off to Blackbeard's Cove for Eli and Jude. They celebrated Tawes's birthday party in pure boy style. Putt-putt ......

Go-Karts......

And arcade games.....

I love how each kid got the chance to shine a little and how awesome the Spring weather felt. Perfect weekend!